If you wanted to leave some money to your children, how would you split it between them? You could come up with numbers based upon their likely need for help. Or you could simply divide it equally…after all you love them all, well…equally. Equal distribution is probably the most common way of dividing assets. Yet, what about the situation where one of the kids is very successful financially and has no need for your money? What message does an unequal gift send?
Conversely, if you were one of the children on the receiving end…what if mom and dad left all (or even most) of the money and investments to your sibling because you ‘don’t need it?’ You might feel ‘less loved’, or slighted in some way, left with a nagging feeling that perhaps they really did love them a bit more than you.
People tend to embrace this statement. It sounds true: surely only shallow, materialistic people would insist that money could buy happiness. To utter the thought aloud is almost like a declaration that we aren’t materialistic (and hopefully not shallow!)
Scientists have long been perplexed about how to measure such a thing as happiness. Studies that examine relationships between money and happiness raise the idea that although money may not directly bring us happiness, it has the potential to.
Believing that money can’t buy happiness is a bold and sweeping generalization that weakens under scrutiny. The authors of the book, Your Money or Your Life present a “fulfillment curve.” As the curve in the diagram shows, money spent to meet basic needs brings the most precipitous rise in satisfaction.
Think of all the times you felt pleasure as the result of buying something. When I started interviewing for my first job in the investment business I bought the most expensive suit I could afford. I felt like a million bucks every time I wore that suit! Of course that led to a penchant for expensive suits but that is another issue.
Money does not just buy things but also experiences. How many beautiful memories come to mind because you gave yourself permission to spend money on a new experience or adventure. I can think of so many trips we took as a family or even in younger days before having children. Those were clearly happy times. Weren’t they?
We use money every day. We spend on things, experiences, etc. Maybe you are planning the next big adventure in your life…or figuring out how to save the money to remodel the bathroom. Behind these activities there is a presumption that money used in these ways will make us happy. Do money and happiness even belong together in the same sentence?
In some of my workshops participants fill out a survey asking them to agree or disagree with statements on money beliefs. One of the statements is “money makes me happy.” I never kept a specific tally but I always looked at whether they checked yes or no on that question. My recollection is a fairly even split between those who agreed with the statement and those who didn’t.
I wonder if some checked “no” because we’re not supposed to find happiness in such a thing as money
In the past several articles, we’ve looked at the variable nature of prices. What does a gallon of milk or a hotel room cost? How much does it cost to retire? What types of financial management services are there, how much do they cost, and which one might work best for you? In that vein, why pay someone to manage your money?
I recently told the story of a client who experienced immense relief upon delegating the management of her finances. Making all the decisions on her own had left her plagued with fear and anxiety. My listener exclaimed, “But my father said never to pay fees!” Such advice might be good for one person, but not so good for another. While I agreed that one should pay as little in fees as possible, my listener’s objection raised the question: What are some of the reasons to have your money managed professionally?
This soup is the epitome of winter comfort food! Hot, savory and filling. It makes a great lunch or dinner. If you make stock and cook lima beans in advance it comes together in less than an hour.
3 T canola oil (duck fat is good too!)
1 C. diced onion
1 C. diced celery
2 C. cooked lima beans (about one cup dried)
1 C. diced carrot
2 large sprigs of sage
6 fresh thyme sprigs or ¼ tsp. dried
5 juniper berries (optional) smashed
1 small bay leaf
1 ½ C. diced ham (about ½ pound)
1 large clove garlic thinly sliced
4 C. green cabbage large dice (3/4 inch)
Do you have any idea of the costs and fees associated with your investment accounts? The previous articles in this series have explored the difficulty of determining what things really cost. In discussing this issue with some friends, another frustrating cost question arose: “What does it cost to invest your money?” There was unanimous agreement that information about investment costs was often scarce and confusing. What fees are associated with investing? How do we find out?
Many people don’t know whether or not their accounts are being managed by anyone, and whether or not they are being charged. In this article, we’ll look at those investment accounts you may have. What exactly are you paying for? How much does it cost to have your money managed for you? Some investment vehicles, specifically mutual funds and ETFs, have “expense ratios.” We’ll look at those as well as 401Ks.
Last month’s article about prices began as a rant about the difficulty of knowing what specific items should cost and how to assess their value. In this month’s article, we’ll look at the “price” of retirement. How much does it cost? Have you saved enough?
As a financial planner I want to know what something is going to cost before I say “yes.” Sometimes this can feel a little embarrassing. I’ll be the first to ask the waiter, “So how much is that swordfish special?” Did you grow up hearing, “If you have to ask, you probably can’t afford it”? I have the excuse that “it’s my job,” but I know that many people experience fear around asking. I’m not the only one who wants to know.
Do you know how much a half gallon of orange juice costs? Think carefully. What was once a 64-ounce container of juice is now 59 ounces. A pint of Hagen Daz is just 14 ounces (Ben & Jerry’s still has a 16 ounce “pint.”) How do you compare?
Take another example, hotel rooms. I found a great place to stay in Sonoma for under $200 a night in February. This summer there was nothing under $300 at the same place. I recently purchased artwork for my office. I had no idea how much to offer, except that it had to be lower than the asking price! Plane flights, cars…ditto. Clearly, some prices do vary based on seasonal factors. Yet, is there such a thing as the “real” or best price for anything?
In a workshop I gave some time ago, a woman named Lisa related the following story. She had been sent to the store with money to buy milk for dinner. As she was leaving the store, she spotted a cute little stuffed bear. She had change in her pocket and thought, “I can buy this!” All the way home she was excited as she anticipated showing her mom what she had bought. But when she got home, her mom screamed at her, ordering her to return the bear and bring back the change!
The little girl was traumatized…
Back in 2008 a woman in her mid 50’s came to my office for an initial meeting to discuss her personal finances. She had rescheduled at least three times. About half way into our meeting I asked her, “So, how was it for you gathering your information to come see me?” Her response displayed such vulnerability and courage I’ll always remember it. She said, “I’m am so embarrassed! I’m so disorganized! I’m at a point in my life where I feel like I should be more together. I’m ashamed that I don’t have more saved.”
Whether you earn a little or a lot of money you can find yourself having similar feelings.
In their book, Why Smart People Make Big Money Mistakes, Gary Belski and Thomas Gilovich state: “Numerous studies over the years have demonstrated significant overconfidence in the judgments of doctors, lawyers, engineers, psychologists, and securities analysts.” According to these findings, highly educated people seem to see their “smarts” in one area as evidence that they are more knowledgeable in other areas as well. But it’s not just professionals who fall prey to this belief. It appears to be part of human nature generally to over-estimate our abilities. For instance, in rating our skills at driving, how many of us think we are “smarter than the average bear?”
If you are interested in becoming more educated about financial planning and the psychology of money you’re in the right place. We’ll be writing about some of our favorite topics, in particular how emotions impact financial decisions. Since food has always been a passion we’ll occasionally post some of our favorite recipes.
Mandatory caveat: This blog is for educational purposes only.